Saturday, August 8, 2009

Getting Sick, I mean Fit, Just Thinking About It!

Here we go kids...Mommy's got a new project! Wanna' know what it is? Getting back into shape!! What? You've heard that before, you say? Okay. True enough. But, after the baby I was just all freaking out about the fact that I couldn't fit into any of my clothes. It's a tumultuous, hormonal, icky time (aside from the having an adorable little baby that you just love to little bits and pieces part, of course). I stopped eating all junk food. I didn't drink any pop. I was working out here and there. And I was not loosing any weight. That's enough to make a hormonal-gal crazy. So, I got over myself.

It's always the same with me. I've had 3 kids now. I know the routine. While I am nursing my body just holds on to all my extra fat stores for dear life. There is just nothing I can do to shake them. And, getting on the scale was going to do nothing but give me some sort of disorder. So...I took to photography. I started snapping pictures like crazy. I filled my time with something other than thoughts of my (admittedly kinda naturally smallish but completely) out of shape body. And guess what...I can fit back into my pants now. Well, some of them.

Does that mean I'm back into shape? No. Far. Far. From it. I am willing to bet you can outrun me any day of the week. It doesn't matter who you are, because...I can't run. I'd probably pass out by the time I reached the end of my driveway. And, my arms - eeee - I have now developed my mother's arms (no offense, Mom). I had such nice, sculpted, arms for my wedding day. I looked just lovely in my strapless gown. And now...they are still waving "Good-bye" long after I've stopped.

And guess what the worst of it is? Tomorrow I have to go to the cottage. My BIL and my SIL's cottage. You know my SIL? The former model? Never had a kid in her life (let alone 3 c-sections...lots of scar tissue there to make you look like you have a huge pudge even if you didn't)? Super, drop-dead, gorgeous girl? Ya. Her. And guess who else is coming? Her sister.

Yep. That's her.
No. I'm not kidding.

Let's just take this in for a moment shall we?

Yah. Good times.

So, I'll roll out my blindingly white, mother of three, flabby-self along side those two. Woot.
So...oh yeah...back to my point.

I just ordered the Physique 57 Work-out DVDs!!!!

This is the exercise program that Kelly Ripa uses. Hey! She's a mother of three, too. And, I think she also had c-sections. Yah. There is hope!!
I can't wait for them to arrive. Unfortunately, they won't do me any good for tomorrow, so I may just have to drink heavily instead. Or, maybe I'll get them all drunk!! That's a good plan. Then I'll look so much better!!

But, once the DVD's get here I'm starting up an official Physique 57 get Mommy into Shape Project! I cannot wait.

Who is joining me?!?!? Any other Physique 57 Mom's out there???????


Shan said...

What is this Physique 57 you speak of? Although the name alone makes me cringe. Oh and there are some of us who feel that way around you. *wink*


I hear your pain and I feel for you. I think I would find excuses not to be at that cottage.

Wear a one-piece and hold that baby the whole time. Serves 3 purposes: 1-Constant reminder of why you are not back in your size 0 bikini, 2-Covers your baby flab and 3-Come across as a loving, doting mother.

The Tsunami Mommy said...

This might be the funniest thing I've ever read. Oh My God. At least I am keeping the company of other moms who probably feel the same about their bodies as I do mine... not TWO MODELS! Dear Lord girl, how did you do it? LOL!

Mommy Project said...

I know. I know. Thank-you all for your sympathy. I deserve it.

It's one of those deals that is so incredibly horrific...ya' just gotta' laugh. ;-)