Tuesday, July 14, 2009

It's Hard Letting Go..

We have always had a plan when it came to the sleeping arrangements of our babies. Well, I always have had a plan and Dave has always gone along with it. From the time the babies are born they sleep in the bed with me. Even at the hospital. That made for very little sleep for me (read: none) as I held them tight against me in the little, narrow, hospital bed. But, once we get home it is much better and even easier to grab some sleep. When the baby needs to be fed, I just have to sit up and feed her, then go back to sleep. No need to even get up. But, that was never the real reason for it. SIDS was the real reason for it. I have always been terrified of SIDS (what mother isn't?) and I would never, ever, ever, get any sleep if the baby was in a different room from me. As it was, I needed to wake up and put a hand on the baby several times per night to make sure she was still breathing. And, in my mind, if the baby was right there with us - hearing us breathing - that would help her little body and mind remember to breathe, too. No exactly scientific, but just something I believe somewhere inside my bones.

At 4 months the odds of loosing a baby to SIDS goes down. So, at that point, we have always moved the baby to a crib right beside our bed. She is still in the room, right beside me, but she (and we) have a little more room and she can start getting used to being on her own a little bit. Then, at 6 months, the baby makes the big move to her own room. That's how it was for Maddie and that's how it was for Jamie.

Colie is now almost 6 months herself, but she had yet to leave our bed. There are many excuses, I mean reasons, for this: her crib is all set up in her room and won't come through the doors unless we take it apart again, her portable crib is at her Grandma's house and we keep `forgetting' to get it, and she just seems so happy in the bed with us. How can we boot the poor little kiddo out?

Well, this past Saturday - we gave it a shot. The baby fell asleep on our bed. In her spot. All comfy-cozy smack dab in the middle. But, we gently picked her up and brought her to her crib. Shockingly enough - she slept through the whole night! Not a peep from her! In fact, it was Dave who woke her up (bright and early in the morning).

Wow. That was much easier than we thought. She didn't seem to mind sleeping in her crib at all.

The next night, Dave brought her back to our bed. Yep, that's right. Dave.

And she has been there every night since.

Sometimes it's hard letting go...


Shan said...

Oh what a sweet picture! And Dave is just a sweetie too. I was the total opposite. I couldn't get comfortable enough to really sleep if they were in bed with us. And I have tended to have a harder time letting go with My Pie than I did with Abby. Which she was fine with, but now she wants to stretch her wings.

Leah said...

Without an even younger sibling in the house, it's hard for me to truly remember just how BIG Connor is really getting. When Emily was three, she had a one year old brother, and she seemed SOOOO grown up in comparison. When Jared was three, HE had a one year old brother, was extremely verbal, and despite having an older sister, still seemed soooooooo grown up compared to baby Connor. Connor has no siblings and just seems like my baby still. If that all makes sense. I definately have a harder time letting him "go". He's my last, we fought so hard through the pregnancy to get him to this point in the first place, etc. While it's hard letting go, it's also nice holding on! These moments in their lives are gone in the blink of an eye, and I don't think there's any harm in savoring them for a few extra seconds when we can... XOXO

Mommy Project said...

Ahhh...that's how I feel, too, Leah. "It's nice holding on". :)
Thanks for that. Dave is the one that brought her back...but I am glad he did. I'm not ready, either.

And, thanks Shanny. <3


My brother used to have his kitten sleep with him. A couple times, he rolled over the kitten in his sleep but was awakened by the meowing. One time, he wasn't awakened. I know cats and babies are different, but I was always fearful of us rolling over on the baby in our sleep.

You and I have a mutual friend from elementary school whose child died from SIDS about 18 years ago. That always stuck with me so I was concerned when we had children. I always wanted a bassinet but J vetoed that.

Interestingly enough, both our kids were high risk for SIDS, but they ONLY way they would sleep, is on their tummies. I tried all the devices and tricks, but they were tummy sleepers. Believe me, I was never closer to God. I used to pray, pray, pray that they didn't stop breathing. I had the baby monitor turned on HIGH so I could hear them breathing.

I wonder, did people 100 years ago deal with this stuff?

Mommy Project said...

That is so sad about the kitten.

One of my friends (I'm not sure who it was now) once said while she was pregnant, "I can't wait for the baby to be born, so I can stop worrying". Poor girl...just had no idea (yet).

Mommy Project said...

{oh...but i'm not glad she is back in our bed out of worry anymore. At least I don't think so. I just like having the little cuddle-bug there. And, clearly, so does Davey. Yet...the day will have to come...soon.....}